The $25 Rule

80% of married couples spend money their spouse does not know about and almost 18.5% of those married people have credit cards their spouse does not know about. - CESI

You know, I can completely believe this. We live in a culture today that doesn't take marriage to mean "two become one", but instead "what's mine is mine, thanks for sharing the house." I think it's a bit sad to say the least. I don't really care, barring some situations, how your household runs, but I do know that money issues are one of the top reasons for divorce in this country.

Nicole and I have a $25 rule, which basically means that neither one of us can spend more than $25 without consulting the other. Obviously, this isn't true about the bills. We talk about our monthly bills nearly every week without fail. The $25 rule might seem crazy low to some of you, to others the whole idea of having a limit on the amount of money we spend seems too controlling. The point is that we are poor, homeowner newlyweds who are trying to get rid of all of our debt including cars and student loans as fast as we can. If Nicole or I went around spending more than $25 without talking about it first, bills wouldn't get paid, savings wouldn't get handled etc. We use each other as a type of checks and balances. For example, Nicole recently (nicely) vetoed the beautiful, rusty, vintage tandem bike I found on craigslist. She was all about looking at it until I told her it cost $150. She gently let me know that $150 was way too much for a bike at this point in our lives. I appreciate her.

This money rule is important for more than just the fact we are trying to be smart with our money. Money can get people into all types of trouble which means if I have to talk about what I'm doing with my money I'm less likely to do something crazy with it like gamble away our mortgage or gas money. So, besides keeping each one of us out of trouble, talking about our money, well, keeps us talking. I'm not saying that we run out of things to say (I'm too much of a talker for that!), but instead I mean that this rule makes sure we keep talking about the important household things and get in the habit of doing so. I don't want to slip into the idea that she runs that part of our life and I run this part without some conversation. Don't get me wrong we both have our "specialties" in our household and that works really well, but we both still talk about everything. For example, please do not ask me to find the pots and pans in our kitchen. You will have just as much luck as I will. Trust me. My lady, and I am blessed to have her, willingly takes care of all the cooking. All of it. She likes it that way and so do I. On the other hand, don't ask Nicole if her cute green shirt has been washed. She won't know. I do the laundry, but we still make sure to discuss and have input in both of those.

I like our money rule. Nicole and I tend to shop together when we do mostly because we carpool (and happen to enjoy each other's company), but it has helped us and more importantly it's getting us into the habit of communication outside of the normal gushy newlywed stuff.